Category Archives: Uncategorized

New Digs

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Please bear with me as I get the new site up.

Sincerely,
The Geriatric Aesthetic

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You Can’t Argue with Google

I glanced over at the ads in my Gmail inbox and noticed this little gem.

I don’t know how the vaunted Google algorithm works but it seems to think the above ads are of some relevance. The only thing I’m not sure of is the Louisville doctor thing. I’ve never even been near Kentucky.

After seeing this, though, maybe I should ask my travel agent. Perhaps there is some bastion of whittling that I’m not aware of. Maybe the lawn bowling is out of this world. The geriatric possibilities are endless.

Nature is an Old Lady

by Bridget Sanchez

 
Weather has struck Southern California with rain. An atypical phenomenon, to be sure, and it reminds me of a certain quote, which goes something like this:

“Velvet pillows, safari parks, sunglasses; people have become woolly mice. […] Instead of expressing their gratitude for the rain by getting wet, people walk around with umbrellas. Nature is an old lady with few friends these days, and those who wish to make use of her charms, she rewards passionately.”

The Rider, by Tim Krabbé

An old lady came to visit us and I, for one, am awaiting her return.

Origin Stories

I’m twenty-nine years old. Not all that young but certainly not old either. My manner of dress isn’t exclusively old man-ish–the elderly do not have a monopoly on wool cardigans, tweed jackets or plaid shirts, as any hipster would be inclined to assert in a snooty tone. However, my Pendleton shirts do nothing to contradict the fact that my hobbies lean toward the geriatric.

I garden. I listen to NPR. I use table saws. I sew.

At this point you’re still thinking these may just be the leanings of a hipster. But can I add that I also go fly-fishing? And if I’m not affecting the hobbies and preferences of an octogenarian then I certainly have the physical ailments of one. That’s because at age twenty-nine I suffer from sleep apnea, a condition that is more likely to afflict an obese man on Social Security. Oddly enough, I am neither obese nor on Social Security.

I am a twenty-nine year old geriatric. Let me share my life with you.